A Different Kind of Normal, Part 1
Written By Charlotte Meryman
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Braving the Party
The superhero party is at full tilt when Michelle and Jimmy get there. Most of the heroes and princesses dashing about are preschoolers from Jimmy's class at Longmeadow's Blueberry Hill School. The kids are climbing on and off swings, hopping in and out of ride-on toys, and jumping on a small trampoline. Well, at least there's no bounce house, Michelle notes with relief.
She hands their gift to the birthday mom and focuses on coaxing Jimmy to say, sign, or wave hello: a first step in drawing him out. Michelle casts about for a way to join the party and quickly spies the swing set. She guides Superman down the slide, where two boys in Spider-Man and Batman costumes are dancing around a big red plastic wagon. Jimmy peers into the wagon, and Michelle seizes the moment. "How about if Jimmy sits in the wagon and you guys pull him?" she suggests brightly.
Success: She sets Jimmy inside, and the superheroes excitedly cart him across the lawn. Jimmy grins as he bounces along. But the victory is short-lived. The boys soon dart back to the swing set, leaving Jimmy, who can't manage climbing out of the wagon, adrift. He gazes about in puzzled frustration until his mother, now chatting with another mom, spies her stranded son and liberates him.
For Michelle, whose long days are spent driving Jimmy to and from his school and his occupational, physical, and speech therapy sessions - not to mention chasing after Maddie, who'd scamper to the rooftop if you let her - catching up with other adults feels great. Yes, the party is rife with mine fields, but it's also a prime chance for Michelle to connect. Over the next hour and a half, with one eye (and often one hand) on Jimmy, she steals time to talk.
She visits most with Chris Panetti, mom of Jimmy's classmate Robert (aka Spider-Man). Robert struggles with speech and sensory processing problems. Michelle finds she feels most at home with other parents of kids with special needs; Chris gets the big picture. It's a comfort.
The birthday mom has an announcement: Time for the obstacle course! More like the nightmare course, thinks Michelle. Typically, Jimmy either cries or walks away from setups like this. It's not that he's fragile. Jimmy loves roughhousing on land and in water with his dad. It's just that he's not interested. Michelle warily looks over the homespun arrangement of lumber and toys - it's actually pretty tame - and resolves to give it her best shot.
Michelle shepherds Jimmy to the first obstacle, a balance beam of boards laid end to end on the grass. Still chatting with Chris, she guides him from start to finish. Surprisingly, he follows along, staying mostly on the wood. Michelle lifts him onto a scooter and pushes him to the trampoline, where she holds his torso and bounces him up and down a bit. He's three for three so far and still no tears.
